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Things are picking up and improving these past few days.  Looking forward to visiting family positively affects my mood but things at work have been going well for me too.

I had a couple of great lessons this week which always boosts my confidence as a teacher.  In science we had a really great project kit this time.  We got some foam, motors, a propeller, wires and a battery pack to assemble small boats.  Then my head teacher arranged to have two wading pools inflated in the cooking room so we got to go downstairs and splash around with the boats.  It was actually a fun project to make, I felt like the kids really learned something, and they really enjoyed it as well.

Today we had a free-for-all art class where the only instruction was to make a house.  The kids collected milk cartons from home and had free reign to use any materials in the art room.  I definitely learned what a control freak I am and had to let go of that a bit and let them do what they want to do, but most of the kids get excited when they have the chance to do something so open-ended.

Greatest discovery of this year– 6 year olds can use masking tape from the roll without assistance!  All year I’ve been using the tape dispenser to pass out scotch tape, and now I know they can find the end on a roll of masking tape and rip it off by themselves.  You have no idea how much easier my job will be with this knowledge.

We’ve finally reached that point in the year where everyone’s adjusted to their workload and I got to slow down a bit during planning period today.  I was actually caught up on all of my work and had nothing to work on!

I also got good feedback from my boss which boosted my confidence.  It’s rare that managers or higher-ups take the time to give compliments to their employees so I really appreciated that.  There’s a lot of changes going on at the school these days and I’m trying to position myself strategically.  So far I feel like that’s going well.

There’s nothing else big to update on until tomorrow when my sister arrives, I just wanted to leave things on a positive note here.  If I look back at the past string of posts they are all pretty depressing and I don’t want you to worry!

..our kindergarten class fish.  But this tale starts earlier.

The past week or so it seems like luck just hasn’t been on my side.  There have been a few incidents that left me feeling like the universe is trying to screw with me.  Work has been lousy.  I got ripped off at the salon and was highly overcharged for a hair dye job that looked absolutely terrible.  We tried to buy a microwave and everyone kept trying to rip us off.  After we settled on a microwave the taxi driver completely ripped us off and dropped us off very far from home where no taxi could come get us and we had to climb up the big hill to get home.  It was feeling ridiculous and becoming difficult to maintain a positive attitude about, we, Korea.  I say this all with a laugh at this point, not seriously affected.

Then yesterday a terrible thing occurred.  At the end of the day I scooped Mini into a cup and took his tank to the bathroom to change the water.  I put in the de-chlorinating drops and left it there while I went out to dinner.  When I returned to put Mini into the fresh water, Mini was nowhere to be found!  I looked everywhere.  I looked all over the stand the cup was on, I looked under the stand, I looked inside the fan next to the fan, I looked under the CD player.  I even looked in the CD player.

I was started to think someone was puling a prank on me when I spotted the red betta fish, lying on the floor several feet away, dry and still.  I approached Mini’s body and reached out a finger when it suddenly started flopping around frantically.  It shocked me so badly that I dropped my umbrella and it popped open.  Amy, a coworker, laughed at me.  I scooped Mini into my hands and put him into the tank.  He swam crookedly and I dropped some flakes into the water as an apology.  He ate a few and I went home shaken but relieved.

This morning I came into the classroom and Mini was sunken sideways, somewhat pale, and completely deceased at the bottom of the tank.  I was sadder than I could have expected, and feeling very guilty.  I gave him a goodbye in the girls’ bathroom and then asked my head teacher what the best way to break the news to the children was.  We settled on, “Mini was lonely so we took him to Han River to swim with other friends.”

Well, my children arrived and nobody noticed a thing; a testament to the fact that I alone took care and actually cared about the fish.  Finally, around lunchtime, we were sitting around enjoying Teachers Day goodies– pizza, chocolates, hamburgers, doughnuts, and a whole lot of haul that parents sent us to make us feel appreciated.

“Mini is hungry too,” J said.

“Where is Mini???” came a chorus from all of my students at once as they looked around the room.  I had wondered if I’d get off without having to ever explain and they would just forget that Mini had ever existed.  Instead I was put on the spot.

“You know, I forgot to tell you– Mini was feeling very lonely because he had no friends, so Jane Teacher and I took him to Han River to play with new friends.  Do you know what ‘river’ means?”

That was the English teacher in me coming out, trying to distract and redirect the conversation.  But I was not to get away with it.

“Mary Teacher,” said G, with narrowed eyes. “Betta fish is fighting fish.  Play with friends then fighting and bad.” He looked at me inquisitively but Jane couldn’t keep from laughing.

“Mini promised to play nicely. You know, you promised the same thing, right? If you want to see Mini you can go visit him at the river.” I know I get away with saying this kind of bulls**t because their English isn’t good enough to keep pressing me, and I take advantage of this fact all of the time.  But I know, I just know, G is going to be a problem for me eventually.

It’s a hard week.  I’m feeling very down again.  I’m trying my best to keep my head down and get a lot of work done so that I can enjoy my family visiting, and hopefully all of the negativity will wash right past me when I resurface.